What To Expect When You Are Expecting 

Disclaimer: This post is NOT about pregnancy. I just borrowed the title.

Allah gives us what we want, sometimes even word for word, but not necessarily the way we want it. 

Think of this little incident that happened today. Since I am not praying this week, I was feeling little restless. The best days of the year are here, and not feeling tranquil enough to devotedly remember Allah when every good deed is most beloved to Him was something that was really bothering me. So I requested a friend to pray for me, that I am able to peacefully do my dhikrs and duas. I dont start praying till another two days.

Or atleast I thought. I am never wrong about my days, I always keep a count so I know when I start praying.Just a while after I told her to pray for me, I realised that for some odd reason this month my calculation went wrong. It is actually today I start praying. And as I prayed, I felt that serenity as if I came back home. Alhamdulillah.

When I asked my friend to make dua for me, I was expecting (and thats what she made dua for) to feel calm and settled in my heart and mind, so I can sit in my prayer mat for hours and to my tasbeeh, dhikr and duas. But surprisingly, Allah gave me exactly what I wanted- peacefully pray and worship Him, but now how I wanted. He ordained that I start praying today, and orchestrated the events perfectly that today turned out to be the day when it so happens. I never thought today would be the I start praying, and hence my expectations were based on what I knew, not what I didnt know.

This is something I have been reflecting on for a while. Sometimes we become so obstinate, so headstrong in the things that we ask for, that we focus more on the HOWs than the WHATs. Our job is to pray for the WHATs, we are in no position to tell Allah HOW to give those WHATs to us. We cant tell Him how to do His job, we cant dictate the terms as to how we want our prayers delivered to us. For when we do so, more often than not, we stand in the way of getting our prayers answered. 

Be very specific about WHAT you want, just not HOW you want it. Reminder to myself first, because I sometimes obsess too much on the process rather than the goal.

Take to good and leave the rest to collect dust.

Advertisements

The Express Shipping News: Al Muqaddim (The Expeditor)

When we try so hard to have our prayers answered, wake up in the middle of the night, fast for days, spend hours in prostration to Allah, watch out for rain, perform charities- we often think of “what else” to do.


Helping out someone in need is a great way to have your doors opens, those doors you have been incessantly knocking for so long. Anything, infinitesimally small, as mundane as helping a heavily pregnant woman lift up a jar of water to doing the dishes at home when its not your turn, setting up the plate for your parents with food or simply take out the slippers for them from the closet when they are heading out, all are pleasing to Allah. You never know who is going to make a secret dua for you behind your back, or whose relief would be so pleasing to Allah that He will express deliver your duas to you. Especially lifting off a hardship for someone- helping an elderly cross the road or give up your seats for them, allow someone in need to stand in the queue in front of you even though its your turn- sincere, genuine kindness is always pleasing to Allah. Afterall that is His attribute, for He is Al Rauf (The Kind One).



When we say Allah is Al Muqaddim (The Expediter), it does NOT mean Allah can open your doors or answer your prayers quickly, for we already know that when we call him by the name Al Qadeer (The All Able). Al Muqaddim means Allah DOES expedite.He does ship your requests with express delivery.


Let me say it again- Allah not only CAN expedite, in fact, He DOES expedite. Al Muqaddim is the One who DOES expedite your prayers, because He can, because He is Al Qadeer. Its one thing for someone to be able to do something, but its another thing for them to actually do it. That is why the Prophet (peace be upon him) once prayed for the rain, and said “quickly, and not delayed”. (Ref Dua: Weapon of a believer by Sh Yasir Qadhi)

Where’s The Party Tonight? 

When I started my gratitude journey about six months back, for me it primarily meant to journal the good things that happened that day, and to observe the increases as I kept being grateful. The months that followed brought about a lot of goodness in my life, both in terms of state of mind as well as in physical manifestation of blessings. All of these are nothing but promise of Allah. Alhamdulillah.


The last few months also have had some excruciatingly challenging times, times when I got knock punched at the pit of my stomach,times when doubted, stood at the verge of breaking down and giving up, and so on. But if there is one thing I have learnt was yes, I had to cling onto my journals like a lifeline, yes I had to thank Allah in my prayers for the good things He showered, but what I also realised was that I had to celebrate with Allah.

Yes celebrate! Allah gives us joy so we can be grateful. However, genuine, true gratitude goes above and beyond ritualistic confinements of worship prayer, fasting, charities etc. Of course you do them, but the underlying attitude TO ALLAH is what sometimes we miss out. How many times have you taken one extra slice of that mud cake, poured one extra scoop of icecreme, or binge ate till your stomach bloated, just because you wanted to show Allah how happy you are? Sure we all do these perhaps to show some self love, I am no exception either. But when doing them out of love for Allah, to spoil yourself to show Allah how happy you are, to know that Allah is watching you being so glee with joy, crashing at your couch and not open your eyes till its noon the next day because you feel so good, how happy is Allah feeling to see His favorite slave so happy YET remembering to include Him in the party? He loves you more than your mother, so if mother would have tears in her eyes just to see you so drunk with happiness, imagine how Allah must feel, when He knows EXACTLY the type of feeling you are getting? He created those feelings of glee inside of you, He is the only One who knows how amazing those happy feelings are, other might understand but only Allah knows the degree. SubhanAllah.

So next time you do a self love party, include Allah as your friend. Ask Him which flavor of icecreme, if the mocha would be fat or non fat, or if you should finally get that Chanel you have been thinking of for a long time, and if what you are wearing is making you look 10lbs more or less. Ask Him, Celebrate with Him, Include Him, Remember Him. Because He said:

EveryStruggleAcknowledged.Com -Al Shakur (The Appreciative One)


With the stress from doing everything because the best days of the year are here, remember that Allah is Al Shakur- The Appreciative One. He appreciates the infinitesimal good that you do.
The prophet Muhammad, may peace be upon him, before his demise, advised us to always have the best expectations of Allah. So expect Allah to reward you for whatever, however much you can do, especially when His favorite days are here. In fact having this grand opinion of Allah, The Sublime One, itself is an act of worship it and of itself. SubhanAllah.

Dont get overwhelmed.

Remember what the prophet said: Actions are but by intentions. If you intended to do your best, thats all that matters, inshaAllah.

Serendipity Happens, A Lot Like Love

Sometimes its just a thought

Sometimes its a feeling 

But sometimes, you just know it. Its unexplainable, but you just do. There isnt any other way to say it. Hold onto those.

The Light of Allah is unlike any other light, neither of the East or the West (ref Surah Nur), and so is this feeling. Lights are there to remove darkness of confusions and doubts, to bring in clarity, direction and brightness.So dont try to disturb the magic with worldly shackles of practicality, reality, possibility or logic. 

Wheather you are Sleepless in Seattle, or living At The Lakehouse, taking A Walk In The Clouds or waiting for Sweet November, just for tonight, i need you to forget every Definitely, Maybe, and just Remember This:

Serendipity Happens, A Lot Like Love…


Looking For Grace: Al Lateef (The Subtle One)

I was feeling little antsy since the night before. Didnt sleep properly the whole night, subconscious kept venting all my thoughts in the form of dreams. In the morning when I finally gave up, I called my friend to talk, just to release the tension.

Her phone was on silent, and that very moment she stood up for her prayer. So there was no chance of her hearing my ring. But right that exact, precise moment (by only 3/4rings) for some reason she thought of me and looked (not even checked) at her phone screen, only to find it flashing with my number.


After I was done talking to her, I sat down and reflected on the subtlety of the nuances. Allah knew that I was not feeling well. He also knew that I debated for a while before I actually called her because I might be bothering her. He saw the whole “should I or should I not” dilemma of my “righteous self”. I wasnt even sure if I could even get through to her because sometimes her phone has some technical issues as well.Yet all I needed was to dial her number; Allah pulled the rest of the tricks from His book and orchestrated the chain of events so perfectly, that no matter how many obstacles were on the way, the timing fell perfectly.


Why on the earth did she think of me, and looked at her phone while she was getting ready to pray? She just had my thought that exact moment when I was hoping I could speak to her. Even more so, she could have decided to call me or look at her phone afterwards, but her eyes just travelled in that direction. And as I sit down and think, I realise it wasnt her. There was Someone directing the entire show all along. SubhanAllah!

My Little Bird, You Taught Me The Extraordinary Ar Razzaq


My little bird,

There are plenty of them like you, atleast from the looks of it, in this planet. All of them leave their home and families in pursuit of earning sustenance, to get a better life for themselves. Then somewhere along the way, some of them meet us humans, and we take them under our wings. 

I often laud myself for the way I took care of you. Afterall not every generous human does so much for a bird. I must have been very praiseworthy to Allah that I look after His creation so well, take care of all its needs as best as I could.

Until reality hit me. It never was about me, it was always about you. The reason I stumbled upon you was because Allah wanted me to take care of you. Allah put me, the human, at the service of you, the bird. Allah chose you over me. I was not doing you a favor, Allah wanted you to be favored anyway. He just chose me; for reasons only He knows. It was never about I being superior, it was always about you. I was not feeding you as an act of grace, Allah was feeding you through me. I did not wake up nights after nights for you, Allah woke me up nights after nights, for you. When everyone asked about you, it felt as if they were showing concerns for me, because of my little bird, whereas in reality Allah wanted your mention in their tongues, in their mind, heart and prayers. You were always the superior one. You see, we humans have a different way of evaluating.  We like to be lauded and applauded for the good that we do, so much so that we feel we are the objects of focus. On the contrary, more often than not, who we do for, is actually the VIP in the room. Ordinary and Extraordinary are sometimes mere illusions clouded by our limited abilities to see beyond what we want to see, what we are used to seeing. I am glad you taught me that.

With Love,

Me ♥️

This is a continuation of my post A Grace Extraordinary:Ar Razzaq (The Provider)